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We have compiled some resources that you may find helpful. You may not feel in a position to connect with us at present, but we would like to 

believe that there may be something here that brings you support and comfort in your grief. If you are grieving at present, please know that we  understand your pain, and we both send you our warmest thoughts.

     Books (adults)

  • On Grief & Grieving by Elisabeth Kubler-Ross & David Kesler. This book remains for me, the wisest and most compassionate book on grief that I have ever read. The combined wisdom and experience of the authors provides a framework for understanding the human response to loss. I bought this book after I lost my Dad, and it gave me such comfort (& still does today). What I didn't know at the time, was that I would go on to support many bereaved people myself in the future, and this book has played such a large part in that decision. There are many, many books on grief available, but what radiates from this one, is that only those who have dedicated countless hours to sitting with the bereaved, and to witnessing their grief, could have written a book like this. Elisabeth Kubler-Ross & David Kesler shows us the meaning of grief - a process of healing that allows us to live with loss (Claudia)

  • Letters from the Grief Club by Beth French & Kate Moreton. A wonderful book for teenagers and young people who are grieving. Writing to their younger selves, bereaved adults express the things that they wish they had known when they lost someone close to them in their younger years. A book that radiates hope & reveals that you are not alone (Claudia)

  • A Song Inside: A Memoir by Gill Mann. In this beautiful book, Gill Mann recalls the story of her son, Sam's life, his struggles with his mental health, and his devastating death aged 22. Gill describes this as a 'story about love', that she was compelled to write after Sam's death. In describing her connection to sam now as 'a melody inside me now, a melody that stirs & bursts into life when I think of you', Gill expresses the heartfelt sentiment of the bereaved parents I have supported - there can be no separation between a parent and child, there can only be an enduring, unbreakable bond (Claudia)

  • You are not alone by Cariad Lloyd. This is most relevant for adults bereaved as children or teenagers. I particularly like the audio book version of this as it is read by Cariad Lloyd and includes excerpts from people she has interviewed for her Griefcast podcasts. Cariad talks so honestly about her experience of losing her Dad when she was 15 years old and how it has taken her many years to work with her “grief mess”. She dispels many of the myths around how the experience of grieving should look. She interweaves her own experience and lessons she has learned with information from research, models of grief and the experiences of others. As someone who is a member of ‘the club no-one wants to join’ so much of what she talks about resonates with me. I learnt so much from this book about my own journey and would really recommend it to anyone who had a parent die when they were a child or young person (Caroline)

  • Finding Joy by Gary Andrews. I first heard about this book from a dad with two young daughters. I was supporting him following the unexpected death of his wife. He told me how this book had helped him feel less alone. Gary Andrews is an animator and illustrator whose wife Joy died suddenly when she was only 42. Gary had already been completing a daily doodle diary. Finding Joy contains the illustrations he drew about his life after his wife’s death as a father to two young children. These illustrations are beautifully presented in the book and are full of touching moments which often manage to make me feel like laughing and crying at the same time. What I particularly like is the way Gary visually shows how his relationship with grief changed over two years and how he captures the unique way children grieve jumping from heart breaking comments to matter of fact observations and that this is ok (Caroline). Gary talks to Cariad Lloyd in episode 50 of Griefcast (see podcasts below)

    Books (children)

  • The Day the Sea Went Out and Never Came Back by Margot Sunderland (for children aged 4- 11). This story is about Eric the Sand dragon who loves the sea and watches it coming in and out every day. One day the sea does not come back and Eric cannot understand where it has gone. This therapeutic story sensitively details the grief Eric goes through in a way that is easy for children to relate to. It also shows how he is helped by the support of others and in finding a way to remember his love for the sea. The book helps children to understand and access some of the more complex feelings they are going through and it can feel easier and safer to talk about Eric’s experience than their own (Caroline)

  • The Invisible String by Patrice Karst (for children aged 3-7). This book has been a great help when I have been working with children experiencing worries about separation and loss. The story emphasises how we are always connected by love and uses the idea of invisible strings that stretch from our heart to those of our loved ones. These strings reach all around the world and even to heaven. The book often provides an opportunity to talk with a child about their loved one who has died and how their love carries on. Patrice Karst has also written a book called ‘The Invisible Leash’ to help support children after the death of a pet (Caroline). Activities to accompany The Invisible String are found here: https://patricekarst.com

    Books (adults supporting children)

  • A Handbook of Children’s Grief: For Adults Supporting Children by Atle Dyregrov and Martin Lytje. This newly released book is the most comprehensive guide to supporting bereaved children that I have read. It brings together a wide range of research and the experience of bereaved children, their families and professionals supporting them. Children’s experience of grief is very different to adults and this book highlights how, and why, this is the case. However, like adults, every child’s experience of grief will be unique, and the book considers some of the many factors that influence their grieving process, how they interrelate, and the grief reactions children may experience. The authors offer practical advice throughout and in the chapter ‘Meeting Children in Grief’ they give 14 tips that they believe will act as a good foundation for families and professionals to base their support for bereaved children on. When we work with families, carers and professionals supporting children, their priority is doing the best they can, and they are often afraid of doing the wrong thing. I believe that one of the biggest benefits of reading this book will be the reassurance it provides, and that it will help adults supporting grieving children to do so more confidently.

    Local libraries often stock these books, which may available in print, or as audiobook and e-books. For those in East Sussex, please see here: www.eastsussex.gov.uk/libraries/online

    Websites (adult support)

  • www.sands.org.uk - support for those affected by the death of a baby

  • www.foundationforinfantloss.co.uk - advice, signposting & support for those affected by the loss of an infant

  • www.widowedandyoung.org.uk - peer support for anyone 50 & under, who is bereaved of a partner

  • www.cruse.org.uk - national charity supporting bereaved individuals, and who offer bereavement support sessions

  • www.mariecurie.org.uk - national charity offering end-of-life & bereavement support

  • www.tcf.org.uk - peer support for bereaved parents, grandparents & siblings following the loss of a child of any age

  • https://uksobs.org/ - support for those bereaved by suicide

  • www.roadpeace.org - support for those bereaved through a road traffic accident

  • https://lonetwinnetwork.org.uk/ - peer support for twinless twins aged over 18, who have lost a twin at any age

  • www.StrongMen.org.uk - charity supporting men with the loss of a loved one

  • www.ataloss.org - organisation helping bereaved individuals access support. 'Grief chat' is also available should you wish to live chat with a bereavement counsellor

  • www.way-up.co.uk - an online support group for those who have been widowed

  • www.grief-channel.com - a wealth of interviews, talks & creative ideas to help those who are bereaved

     Websites (child & young person support)

     Websites (practical & financial support)

     Podcasts

  • Grief Works - stories of life, death & surviving. Psychotherapist, and grief expert Julia Samuels talks with bereaved individuals in this podcast, exploring their experiences and their stories of survival

  • Grief encounters - a weekly podcast about love, life & loss

  • Griefcast - Cariad Lloyd's long running podcast in which she interviews well-known comedians & broadcasters about their experience of loss

  • On the Marie Curie Couch - conversations with well-known guests discussing their experiences of grief

Do you have a recommendation for us? We would love to hear from you if there has been a resource that has helped you

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